I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize