I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
