Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
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I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
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I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
50% drunk capacity currently
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.