How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize