thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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