I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I love you.
Bad choice
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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