Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize