Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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