my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
