my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize