I puked a lego.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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