hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.