im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
