Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i already hear my dad disowning me
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
