I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
