hell yes lets make some ravioli
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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