this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
