I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
