So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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