just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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