It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
my being single is dangerous.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
