pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
My vagina just recognized that song.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
