ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
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Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
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I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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