And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
