I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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