I never want to see another naked old woman again.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize