Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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