Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
