weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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