Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
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