i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
