For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Randomize
