i don't want you to think of me as your TA
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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