Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Randomize
