My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
