Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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