i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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