He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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