Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
