I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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