this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
OPIZZABONMYDICK
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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