I want to stick my p in your. b.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
