He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
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Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
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She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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