his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
