You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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