My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize