im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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