we have pet lesbian snakes
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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