I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
