plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
